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The Only Parenting Expert You Need

I once spent three hours trying to implement a toddler bedtime routine I'd read about in a bestselling parenting book. Three hours of tears (mostly mine), frustration, and a wide-awake toddler who clearly hadn't read the same book.

mom's mental load
mom's mental load

After four decades in education and raising four children of my own, I finally admitted what I'd always known deep down: sometimes, the experts get it wrong.

The parenting advice industry is booming. Books, blogs, Instagram experts, and well-meaning relatives bombard new parents with conflicting "must-do" approaches. Sleep train. Don't sleep train. Timeout corner. No timeouts ever. Reward charts work. Reward charts damage intrinsic motivation.

It's maddening.


The Impossible Standards Game

Here's something they don't tell you in parenting class: nobody – absolutely nobody – lives up to all the parenting standards being preached. Not even the experts writing those books.


I've watched thousands of toddlers grow into thriving children over my career, and guess what? They had parents who followed wildly different approaches. The common thread wasn't a specific parenting technique – it was parents who trusted themselves enough to adapt advice to their unique child.


As I work with moms of toddlers now, I see how these impossible standards create unnecessary guilt. You're not just managing tantrums and sleep regressions; you're battling the feeling that some Instagram parent is doing it better. They're not.


Your Child Didn't Read The Manual

Each toddler arrives with their own personality, temperament, and quirks. My oldest responded beautifully to gentle redirection. My second needed clear, firm boundaries. Same household, same parents, completely different approaches required.

Now watching my grandchildren grow, I'm reminded again: children don't conform to parenting theories. They demand we pay attention to who they actually are.

When parenting coaches set rigid standards, they're ignoring this fundamental truth. Your toddler is unique. Your family situation is unique. Your values and goals are unique. Why wouldn't your parenting approach be unique too?

Making Mistakes Is Part Of The Deal

Let me liberate you from perfection right now: you will mess up. I've made countless parenting mistakes. Every good parent has.

The difference between confident parents and anxious ones isn't mistake-free parenting. It's the ability to say, "Well, that didn't work. Let's try something else," without spiraling into self-doubt.

Your toddler doesn't need perfection – they need you to keep showing up, learning, and adjusting. That resilience teaches them more than any "perfect" parenting ever could.


Trust Your Gut (It's Smarter Than You Think)

Your parental intuition isn't just some warm fuzzy feeling. It's built on thousands of hours of close observation of your child.

  • You know if they're overtired or overstimulated. You recognize the difference between a tantrum and genuine distress.

  • You understand their unique communication style.

That knowledge matters more than any general parenting theory.


When advice contradicts your gut feeling about your child, pause. Ask yourself:

🤔Does this feel right for MY child?

🤔Does this align with MY family values?

If not, it's okay to set that advice aside, no matter how many degrees the person giving it has.


Creating Your Own Parenting Path

Instead of trying to follow someone else's perfect parenting map, start drawing your own.

❓What values matter most to your family?

❓What kind of relationship do you want with your child?

❓What strengths do you want to nurture?

Let these questions guide your decisions more than external standards.

This doesn't mean rejecting all advice. Take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Be a curator, not a follower.


After working with families for decades, I can tell you with absolute certainty: the parents who trust themselves raise children who trust themselves too. That confidence is a gift that lasts a lifetime.


So the next time you feel overwhelmed by contradictory advice or impossible standards, remember this: You're already the expert on your child. Trust that knowledge. Parent your way. And know that the mistakes are just part of the beautiful, messy journey of raising humans who feel deeply loved.

That's the only standard that truly matters.


 

If you're tired of second-guessing yourself and want to build a parenting approach that honors both you and your child, I'm here to help.


Let's talk. We'll work together to:

💥Cut through the noise of conflicting parenting advice

💥Identify what actually works for YOUR unique child

💥Build confidence in your parenting decisions

💥Create family routines that reflect your values, not someone else's


No more “should-a's” or one-size-fits-all formulas—just a personalized path that helps you trust your instincts, enjoy parenting more, and raise a confident, happy child.


Ready to start? Schedule your call here.

Because you don't need more parenting theories. You need to trust yourself.

Let's start that journey together.

 
 
 

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